Precious moments

9:25, 7th day of Cloudreach
So, while the brave one was still sick, the quiet one has left. Strange thing, I thought they were inseparable. Also, the templar has left too, infatuated by that Dalish mage girl… isn’t it ironic?. Are you going to be a late bloomer, my offspring? It was the presence of this templar which made you look empty? Also the half-elf has found a male love, and doesn’t pay attention to her. Not that he paid much before, but he was distracting. She’ll get over it soon. And this makes things easier to me, I only need to focus on one. She’s the one, I’m sure, and now she’ll be alone and my shadows can get her. She will be mine at last!!!
(Excerpt from Edanhor Blank’s journal, as found in Highever on 9:25, 14th day of Haring)

PRECIOUS MOMENTS

I caress Stripes. She doesn't seem to notice my mood, as usual. She is curled over my lap while I wonder what to do now.

This has been such a strange night... I had spent two long weeks at the orphanage, where Evelyn and Ser August carried me when I got ill, because they didn't trust the care I would receive at the inn, and there nobody was allowed to visit me.

When I came back, I was told they both had left the place, but I thought it was just something temporary, that at least Evelyn would come back as soon as she learnt I was there. And I didn't care about it. It was time to come back to the routine and, ah, yes, to stalk Mihitu again.

Then I went late to bed, after learning what I learnt about him, sure that sooner or later I'd listen Evelyn's soft breathing in the twin bed besides mine. But when I got up… I saw I had spent the night alone for the very first time in my life, and I had not even realized it. Evelyn had not returned to the inn.

She was gone. None of her scarce belongings where there. Only a note, with a short explanation saying she couldn't stay there anymore and that it was the moment to live her life.

And it hurts. Evelyn was everything I had. And Ser August... well, even if I never took him too seriously, now that I've lost him is when I must admit how much a father he was for me. I feel a tear running down my cheek and I wipe it out, furious. I can survive. After all, it is all what I have been doing so far.

 

I look at the rune the half-dwarf gave to me last night, when he found me crying over Paws. It shines a bit. It is pretty. What did he say?

"Dinnae worry, lass. 'ere have t'is. T'is will store yer precious memories of somet'ing t'at made ye happy. T'is be all okay, lass".

"How does it work?", I had asked hesitatinly.

"Think real hard at those happy moments, lass. An' tha rune will do tha rest".

I try to focus on a happy moment. Maybe one of these days back at the alienage in which I was able to steal a heavy purse. Or just a moment in which I was able to ridicule stupid Miriel. I look at the rune and try to send those memories to it.

After some minutes, I shake my head. This doesn't work, I don't feel happy. All my moments of happiness in the past included my sister. But thinking about her hurts too much now. How can I think hard at something like that?.

Getting attached to anyone is bad, I recall having said to the tall gay mage. "It gives other people a way to hurt you". But how to avoid being attached to anyone, if you've been tied to her since the very first moment you were conceived? We are two halfs of the same person, we used to joke.

And now she's gone. I wonder if she will miss me as much as I do miss her, wherever she is. I wonder if she has happy moments to store in a rune. I hope she does.

I look at the rune again and suddenly I hate it. There's no happiness for me. Not here, not now. I close my fist around it, and throw it away with all my strenght. I hear it falling somewhere behind the bushes... Stripes meows faintly, protesting because my movement has disturbed her.

As soon as it falls, I head a noise. A gallop, and a pant. Stripes' hair suddenly stands on end and she jumps from my lap, scratching my naked legs with her nails in her movement.
A big, fluffy, furry thing comes to me with a satisfaction expression in his silly face.

Paws approaches me, all proud of himself, and lets the runestone, full of dog drool, fall over my lap. Ecks. Silly, silly, silly dog. First yesterday night. Now again. Why doesn't he leave me alone? He seems to like me as much as his master ignores me.

I take the stone in my hand and try to clean it. For a moment I'm tempted to throw it again, but something stops me: the expecting face of the half-breed dog, who looks at me panting, with his tongue hanging in a stupid way by the side of his mouth, ready to bring it back as many times as I throw it. But his eyes are not stupid. And I think I understand what he means. 

 Maybe it is time to start building my happy moments up myself.

I close my hand around the runestone and get up. Paws waits for me before heading to the inn. I'd swear he's smiling. Oh, well. I need to clean up the room I shared with Eve. Without Ser August support, I will have it hard to afford a single room here, imagine a double, twin bedded one.

I guess it is the moment to leave the inn and return to Denerim. I wonder if Sanga's offer is still up. I can tell her I will pretend to be my sister and myself alternatively. I'm not as good actress as Eve was, but I doubt customers will notice the difference.

When I enter the inn, I notice the tall, dark haired figure of Ser Kyle Mallory. I try to avoid him on my way to my room, I don't want to talk to anybody, but he has seen me.

"You look sad, my lady. Have you been crying?"

"It is nothing, Ser Kyle... Just some dog hair in my eyes". Suddenly I change my mind. I need a distraction. The room can wait. "Do you want to share an ale with me? This time I invite!"

I owe him a pint of ale, and I should pay all my debts before I go. I definitely need that ale before facing the fact I'm alone. I feel tears coming up to my eyes again. Don't think about it, Mari.

"Really nothing? But... but it can't be... Your face says something more" He sighs. "I always like to share an ale with you. Actually you don't need to invite me, my lady."

Why does he worry so much for me? Damn it, Mari! You don't need this. Get rid of him!

But I feel good by his side. Warm and protected. And the Maker knows I need to feel that way right now.

"You're the sweetest person I've met in this inn, Ser Kyle. I can never be sad if you comfort me". Suddenly I feel the urge to tiptoe and kiss his check. "And I already promised you next round of ales would be on my account."

"No, I'm not. I'm rude and very clumsy!" He scratches his head, nervous. He's red as a tomato and that makes him so lovable!. "And no, I'm happy that you invited me, but I won't let you pay this round, my lady". He tries to wink his only eye and just the idea is so hilarious I can't help but giggle.

"No", I reply. I'm determined this time. "I have some money and I plan to spend it getting drunk together". I take his hand and rush to the bar to start spending it.

Kyle just smiles and says: "It's fine, my lady. But you must save your money to buy anything which suits yourself. And I don't mean to spend it buying pints of ale. I always can buy them to you"

Oh, come on, I think. This has been a low strike. While I try to react, he adds:

"By the way, if we both get too drunk, who will take us back to our rooms?"

"You can take me to my room, and I can take you to yours", I tease him. But he seems thoughtful.

"And my lady can't allow to get drunk. Someone could take advantage of it. But if you do I'll just make sure nobody touch or hurt you".

He hesitates, wondering if he has said something wrong. "I hope that doesn't hurt your pride. I'm sure you can take care of yourself most of the times... but I'm willing to protect you anyway". Awww. Protect me. Isn't he cute?

I look at him. It's fun, while we were talking, we have already had two pints. Time flies.

I have the feeling that right now he's the only real friend I have in the world. I wish he felt the same for me. If I lose him, I'll be alone...

"I also think you're a real friend, my lady" What? I must have said it aloud. Damn beer! "But I'm sure sooner or later you'll have more friends. You're cheery, brave and beautiful. You have it easier than a speechless and clumsy warrior as I am".

I cross my arms over the bar and let my head lean on them. If he only knew. Oh, well. I can just tell him.

"I'm alone, Ser Kyle. My twin sister and Ser August are gone". And I feel so lost. I really need a friend much more than I will ever admit.

"Don't be upset, my lady. I'm sure they just have had some problem and don't want you to worry. I will always be here when you need me, listen to you, and you can tell me whatever you like to say to me. Keep calm, whatever happens". 

I feel his hand stroking my hair. It's a good feeling. Now I understand why Stripes likes to be caressed.

Why do I have the feeling he feels as lost as I do?

"My dear ser Kyle... no... they're gone for good... There's nothing left for me here anymore.... So I think I'm going to leave too..."

For a moment I see his beautiful, bright green eye, darken with pain. What have I said? But it disappears as quick as it came, and I'm not sure anymore.

"I'm not going with them", I add. "I don't know where to go... Maybe to Denerim? The lady at the Pearl says she will always have a job for me..."

"Wait... What kind of job?", he asks. So he knows the Pearl. Ha.

I get up and look at him. So close. I don't know what do I expect. But I expect something. And I add, without thinking

"Unless... you want to come with me?"

"What...wait... my lady... Would you allow me to keep you company?" He looks terribly confused and his voice trembles. "If it doesn't bother you, I'd be very happy, really... " 

And he quickly leans over me, kisses my forehead and backs rushed as if he had done wrong.

Something changes inside me. Suddenly the future seems bright and my heart jumps up and down like a scared squirrel. How can I have been so blind?

He has always been here, listening to my troubles, even when I complained about a stupid half elf not liking me. And he just listened, and waited. And I was breaking his heart each day a little bit more. How could I be so selfish?

I've taken a decision. Because my heart demands so. Maybe my heart knew better than me. I giggle stupidly.

"You're so sweet, my dear Ser Kyle! Never, never lose that innocence!"

I raise my head and kiss him sweetly in the lips. I just barely touch them, but he tastes sweet and sour, a mix of ale and vintage wine. It's just a second, but it gives me hours of happiness to fill that rune. It definitely makes me feel much better than that first kiss I stole, now ages ago, from a certain half-elf. 

And then I remember I've seen Ser Kyle hanging around with so many people in the tavern. People I barely know. I didn't think about it, but I don't have the right to make him part from his own friends only because I ask him so.

"I forgot you have here much more friends than me. If you want to stay, I'll understand. But if you ever decide to leave, and you still want me to be your lady..."

Kyle has blushed again. Such a big, strong shem, and he blushes so easily! Isn't he cute? And his voice trembles, but he doesn't go away. My brave knight on shinning armor…

"I... I... actually I don't have so many friends". He scratches his head again. "This is just a stop stage when I need something... I can go with you. I will be your guard on the way. I will pack soon, my lady!"

Kyle rushes to his room. In the way he slips, but he stands up again quickly, ashamed that I may have seen him. As if I cared about it.

I realize he has paid for the beers again. Stubborn Shem. I look at my purse. "Buy something with suits yourself", he said. I remember having seen an elegant dress in one of the merchants' posts. Something suitable for a lady. For his lady.

We're travelling together, and now I don't mind where or why. With him, I can go to the end of the world.

And the happiness rune shines with a beautiful blue glow.

 

Kyle had say Mari should save money for buy something useful for her. and this is what she bought